Sunday, June 14, 2015

Purpose: Explain how crystals grow
L.G: Add detail to my sentences using conjunction and adjectives.

Crystal Kingdom

Did you know that there is a mine in Mexico that can make you as rich as me? If you don’t, then I’m going to tell you how the crystals in the mine grow.
The crystals start as small as a grain of salt. They need mineral water and heat to help them grow. When you are down in the crystal caves, you need to wear a special suit because the heat can get up to 115 degrees. They have been growing for 500,000 years and can weigh up to 500 tonnes. That’s really heavy! They grow 1000 feet below the ground because the deeper you get, the hotter it will be.
Well now you know how you the crystal in the mine grow. Now you can be as rich as me.

By Eva McGeoch

6 comments:

  1. your intro is so good because you have told me how i get rich
    your story is so descriptive and you have told me all about the crystals
    you could work on adding more detail to your story

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  2. Your story makes lots of sence.
    I like how you have used full stops and capital letters.
    What you could inprouve on is more description
    From Mason

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  3. I think you have told me how crystals are formed.
    I like how you said you can be as rich as me.
    You could add a bit more to your hook out.
    From Amy vickers

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  4. I like how you used heaps of describing words.
    I like how you used your learning goal.
    I think you should work on some more conjunctions.
    from Jordan room 20

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  5. Well done Eva. I really like how you have used conjunctions and adjectives. I'd like to no more about how long crystals can stay in the ground.

    From your kind friend Danni

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  6. Well done. I think you have achieved your learning goal by using great conjunctions and adjectives. I like the similies that you have used. I think you can probably add on a bit more to the hook out.

    From your wonderful sister Alex

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